Who is God?

I've been asking myself this question and asking God whom I have believed in for the past 22 years of my life. "Who are you, God?" You have many names, but which is really you? Or are all of these names yours? Alpha, Omega - the begining and the end. Creator. Saviour, Messiah and Redeemer. Father, Friend and Lover. Wonderful Counsellor, Everlasting God.

Different positions in our life plays different roles. A Father protects, cares for and provides for his child. A Saviour saves us. A friend listens to us, supports us and helps us. A lover, loves us. Sometimes our lover is like a friend.

Can our God have multiple identities? Should I be in awe of Him? If so, then should I be distant? If He is a friend, then I can be close. But if He is both, what should I do? Don't you feel confused? Because I do...

If like the church says Christianity is about having a relationship, I wonder how much do I really know God. What does it mean to know a person? To have a relationship with my boyfriend, I first learn to love him, care for him and spend time with him. But to the invisible and inaudible God, how am I suppose to "get to know" you? Why can't you appear in front of me, be so visible that I can see you, feel you, hear you and know that you are here just next to me?

I know that it seems foolish to ask questions like this. For having believed in the same Gd for 22 years, I just want to get to know you again. Fresh from the start. Can you feel my heart crying and asking you to let me know you again? Like a child who just wants to make a new friend. Help me start anew.

When I know you, that is when I will serve you. I dont feel that I fit the shoes of those who serve you because I may not even know who you are.

Who are you?